It’s easier to visit than to play the happy host:
you come when’s most convenient and you leave when best suits you.
No need to sweep the floor or to prepare a fancy meal,
or find a time which suits both James and Jordan, Peg and Bill.
Serve wine or tea? No need to fret, just drink what’s passed around,
and gladly eat a meal that was prepared by other hands.
Don’t feel like chatting? Never fear! Remember: guest, not host.
Just smile from time to time and nod, or laugh if there’s a joke.
And when you’re full of food and tired, say “thanks,” and leave–that’s all!
No need to wash the dishes or clear up the dinner’s mess,
just go on home and brush your teeth and go to bed and dream–
of all the places you won’t visit twice because you take
and never give.
Well, that’s a downer. Never mind; pretend it wasn’t said.